I am living one big "choose your own adventure!" In fact, I am labeled "Some Assembly Required." Would someone please Ass. me? Anybody? A little Ass. help here!..Ah, well...Hey, random word list:

doctor and the medics
old lady smell
yacking Smeernoff
internet shminternet
"I am canadian" but really not...
Seared meat
Who's got time to...oops. out of time.
fleabag
yukon Jack
eye for an eye (old school!)